BLOG 48

Saturday with the young Czech singers was so successful; we will be doing it all over again next weekend when they are having 4 days of intense rehearsal. I will be at the Hope Gala in Dresden before that though on Saturday, this time really doing something other than just sitting in the audience?!

Chimii wanted to know what I felt when Freddie died.
Like most people, I felt shock and sadness. My whole body just felt ripples of cold going through it. But deep inside I think there was also a feeling of relief in that I knew Freddie would not be feeling anymore pain ever again and that he would finally be at peace and not have to worry about any of us, his friends, again, which is something he constantly did.

Anders asked what happened to Freddie’s yellow jacket.
Freddie’s iconic jacket was auctioned a few years ago and is now with a private collector.

Chantoya asked if Freddie ever danced when he went out to the clubs.
Freddie wasn’t a great one for dancing when he went out. Of course, there were times when there would be a group of friends who would persuade him to get onto the dance floor with them, but generally Freddie was happy to stand quietly talking with a few people drinking. When he did go onto the floor, he never danced wildly, he might do a few of his stage moves with his hands, but that was about it.

Georgia wanted to know if Freddie ever watched Eastenders.
As with most TV soap operas, Freddie could take them or leave them. He did watch Eastenders when he knew his friend Anita Dobson would be playing an important scene and also he would occasionally watch Coronation Street, but he never really followed the story lines and feel disappointed if he was to miss an episode.

Siddharth, among many others asked if Freddie was left handed.
In all the time I worked for Freddie I always saw him as right handed. He ate right handed and also wrote with his right hand and generally favoured his right hand over his left. Of course it is possible he was born left handed and then trained to use his right when he was young.

Jon asked what Freddie did with his gold/platinum discs.
They were mostly used as wall paper. Freddie was rightly proud of his achievements and very often some of his awards would find their way onto walls in his various residences. I know there are some photos of the wall in the sitting room in Stafford Terrace showing some of his discs. I helped put up some of them in the apartment in New York and was also there when Freddie covered the wall outside his bedroom in Garden Lodge. That one was difficult as more time was spent measuring everything accurately as Freddie wanted no blue wallpaper showing between them, I also have a gold disc from Finland for The Miracle on my wall as Freddie said it certainly wasn’t his as it was awarded to Freddy Mercury, so he gave it to me.

Cathy wanted to know if Freddie was either embarrassed or ashamed of his HIV status.
I don’t think either of those words would accurately apply to Freddie’s thoughts regarding his illness. As has often been stated before by many people, Freddie kept quiet about it mainly because he wanted to protect his family and friends from inquisitiveness from the press and also to let him get on with as normal a life as possible without non-stop sympathy and concessions from others taking pity on him. When Freddie found out he had AIDS, he knew he had a limited time left and wanted to live what life was left to him, not sit fading away in self pity.

Hally asked if Mary Austin was close to Freddie’s family.
While Freddie was alive Mary had many dealings with all of Freddie’s family. She had known them from the start of her relationship with Freddie in the late 60s and she was always there to talk with them and see them when Freddie was away for great lengths of time. I do not know what the relationship is like now.

Audrey wanted to know if Freddie had any regrets at the end of his life.
As far as I know Freddie had no regrets. During my 12 years working for Freddie one of many things he taught me was to never regret anything in your past. If you spend time thinking about something you did, you are wasting time in the present on something you cannot change, so more of your life disappears. Saying that, perhaps he regretted the fact that there was still music in him. I believe when Freddie died he was at peace with himself, having done everything he possibly could in the last years given to him.

Daniel asked if Freddie or Queen ever went to Bali.
I can’t recollect if Freddie ever went to the island, but I don’t think so. I am not aware of any shows taking place there, but I do remember that John Deacon did take a holiday there at one time.

Thanks for bringing back some lovely memories for me amongst the serious and sadder ones.. Please don’t think I am ignoring anybody’s questions in particular. There are still more than a thousand to go as there are generally more questions coming in than I am able to answer in any one go!